John Barrowman, the openly gay star of "Torchwood" and many major stage musicals, has written the essay "What I Know About Men" for the UK's The Ovserver newspaper. I just love it. I want every repressed person in this world to read this and see what it is like when someone just speaks their truth and is so comfortable in their own skin. It's really something to stive for.

I was especially touched by this section about growing up gay. So many of us can relate:

When I was growing up, homosexuality was like a curse. This was midwest America in the Eighties, so I couldn't exactly make it a known thing. But I never doubted my sexuality. Even as a child, I knew I was different. I would look at a dirty magazine and I would feel drawn to the guy rather than the girl. His bits were more interesting than hers. It would make me feel warm and tingly. After gym class, I'd secretly peek at the other boys in the shower when I knew that I shouldn't. I was nine or 10 and I didn't know what being gay meant.

Later, I made sure I was good at sports and I worked out so they couldn't call me a wimp. I had to copy the others to fit in and avoid being bullied; I'd date girls, dance with them, go for dinner but I used to panic when I was on her doorstop and I'd have to kiss her and feel her up.

This part was interesting. It's something every person who favors "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" should read:

I get loads of letters from soldiers in Iraq. Mostly they say thanks for making their sexuality acceptable but a lot tell me when they come home they are going to come out. I'm proud to represent my community and help these guys if I can.

And finally, John writes about being famous and being gay:

Some celebrities do cash in on being gay. I have and I haven't. Part of my success is down to my honesty in that department but I also like cars, mechanical things, and sports. I exist on that end of the gay community. Gay men aren't all the same. I can be camp but that's just me acting.

The biggest homophobes in Hollywood are the gay guys themselves. I reckon loads of Hollywood actors are gay, we don't know which ones. I guess the industry should be easier for gay men to succeed in, but I honestly don't know. When a straight gay man plays a gay man they get an Oscar. I just play me. If I am looked upon as a role model for young, gay men and women then so be it. I will never be negative about my sexuality. 

Of the 10,708 athletes who will march into Beijing’s Bird’s Nest Olympic stadium on Friday, Outsports is aware of only 10 who are publicly gay, on par with the 2004 Games. There is also a bisexual American softball player. Of the 10 publicly gay Olympians this year, only one is a man: Matthew Mitcham (Australia, diving). The out lesbians are: Judith Arndt (Germany, cycling), Imke Duplitzer (Germany, fencing), Gro Hammerseng and Katja Nyberg (Norway, handball and a lesbian couple), Natasha Kai (U.S., soccer), Lauren Lappin (U.S., softball); Victoria "Vickan" Svensson (Sweden, soccer); Rennae Stubbs (Australia, tennis) and Linda Bresonik (Germany, soccer).

(...)

Dover told the Associated Press prior to the Athens Games about why more gay athletes are not open. "You spend a day with these athletes, and it becomes obvious that gay people are everywhere," Dover said. "The reason many of them aren't out is because they're focused on their job during this time when sports is the No. 1 thing in their lives."

(...)

In the case of men’s gymnastics, Brandon Triche, who was out on his team in college, said he knows of prominent former U.S. gymnasts who are gay but closeted, in some case having sham marriages. These athletes, Triche said, are likely to never come out.

One reason for the secrecy in gymnastics, Triche says, is that gay gymnasts do not want to feed the public perception that theirs is a “gay sport,” at a time when men’s programs are being cut at the collegiate level and the sport struggles for visibility. Triche disputes this perception.

“I think that those who keep their sexuality secret and act overly heterosexual hinder the sport,” Triche said. “My experience shows there are no more gay men competing in gymnastics than in any other sport. I was on my high school football team and there were many more homosexuals on that team than I ever met who were ever openly gay in gymnastics. I was out on my team and had a gay teammate. But there still has not been an Olympic gymnast that has come out.

“I think that for closeted elite gymnasts, not only are they scared to be a role model for gay youth, they are afraid that coming out will confirm the perception that they compete in a ‘gay sport.’ The misconceptions are so far from the truth. Gymnastics is one of the toughest, hardest and most gruelingly difficult sports in the world.”

In a classic Catch-22, the reluctance of gay athletes to come out will be tough to overcome until more like them come forward and prove that being a “gay athlete” is not an oxymoron or hindrance to success.