RP Listener Forum

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:31am

The ridiculous pain The dessicated brow
The surge forward The accident The pity
The chemical drain The truth The stain
The white strangled root The failure of men

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:31am

Dear Mr. President,

What do you think of Mr. Wallace Steven's "Thirteen Ways of Looking at a Blackbird"? I'm convinced it's the most beautiful poem of the 20th century (or should at least make the top five, says my wife). Our favorite stanza is the fifth:

I do not know which to prefer,
The beauty of inflections
Or the beauty of innuendoes,
The blackbird whistling
Or just after.

Sincerely,
Mark Yakich

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:30am

The denial The naked thigh The fatigue
The staggering horse The regret The orange
The confessions The dying red eyes The aging
The sickened The virus The veins

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:30am

VV wrote:

Look, this doesn't happen all the time. I just need the half day today. day-in-and-day-out I give you all I got. I've been in the Platinum club for sales the last 6 quarters in a row! You got plenty of folks around here that can't claim that.

Look at Manbird... he's f*cking off right before your eyes. And he's the one that's been stealing food from other people's lunches in the fridge. I mean what kind of crap is that?

I'm on my second marriage because of this job and I'm just barely holding this one together with spit & gum. Cut me some slack here and I'll be back tomorrow cuttin' it up like usual.

Look, if you wanna go home and take care of some temporary bullsh*t problem on the home front, that's your choice. Your call. You make it, not me. You're the one who's losing all the leads and watching his sails go down the crapper like last night's tacos.

Platinum club? Are you talking about Platinum club now? Are you talking about the past? Because the last time I checked, the past was still the past. Did that change while I was busy shovelling gumption down your throats like a bunch of baby birds waiting for Momma Bird to puke up some worms? Did the past become the future all of a sudden? Maybe left is yellow now, and right is five, and every day is Saturday? Is that how it works now?

Great hollow hellhounds, why is everyone in this office so obsessesed with what used to be? The past is over and f**king DONE, my friends. Your glory days aren't coming back - they ran off with your first wife, they're putting it to her right f**king now, and good. You can't live in the past. You can't feed your faces forever on what you did last year, last week, or even last night. You gotta get over it, right f**king now.

And I won't hear another word against Manbird. He is carrying your used-to-be-damned-good asses these days. If half of you could be a quarter as good as he is, you'd be heroes - I'm talking ticker-tape parades, women throwing themselves at you, and marble statues for pigeons to poop on. But instead of dragging yourselves up by your bootstraps tooth and f**king NAIL, you gotta take your Ginsu knives out, plant them in his back, and call them daisies. Well you know what? They're not daisies, they stink - they're stinkblossoms, and whoa Nellie! you're getting a big f**king bouquet of them hand-delivered come Monday if I don't see some results.

I can't deal with this right now. I'm going out for lunch. Anyone needs me, I'll be at the Dollhouse VIP room until 2.

Try not to suck while I'm gone.

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:30am

Dear Mr. President,

When I has nine, I wrote your mom a letter and she sent me a picture of the White House.

Sincerely,
Holly Kratz

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:30am

Dear Mr. President,

Actually I don't really have much to say here to you, Mr. President. I just wanted to thank Todd Pruzan for his music recommendations, and suggest that he (and you) consider Jim O'Rourke's album Insignificance as well. It came out in 2001, but lyrics like:

If I seem to you just a little bit remote
You'd feel better if you call me a misanthrope
Or whatever floats your boat
But as for me, I'd rather sink my own.

take on terrific "significance" in light of the events of the last 12 months. Don't you think?

Don't sweat the small stuff.

Sincerely,
Jon Fine

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:30am

The half eaten spine The animal teeth
The disappearance The elongated titties
The puckering trout The vodka The gin
The hammer's soft pulp The shotgunned crap

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:30am

Dear Mr. President,

The left lace on my right moccasin broke last week, and I can't find another lace like it anywhere.

Sincerely,
C. Hayden Gilbert

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:29am

The hot squeeze The sand in the throat
The cherry sticks The saliva glands The moon
The rusted hooks The backwards peeling
The quivering grin The suffering The infestation

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:29am

Dear Mr. President,

As a seventy-year-old Korean War Veteran (four year stint:1951Â1955), I have grave reservations concerning a commander-in chief whose military history is, at best, problematical. My DD 214 is, of course, available.

Sincerely,
John Clarke PhD

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:29am

manbirdexperiment wrote:

The powdered gums The hardened yellow finger
The wrinkled odor The beautiful people
The wonderful glass The empty cafeteria
The dying aunt The morose man

The cafeteria's empty because you insisted on showing everyone your penis piercing... Jackass!

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:29am

The walking yard The clipboard The organ taster
The yawning rabbit The stranger's kiss
The knife blade slap of the mockery hand
The exhausted river The dark fire The kneeling

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:28am

The copper The brass The white refined metals
The smoke in the night The high windows
The face in the light The battle The knot
The burning sound The entity in window 4

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:28am

The cell The sheet The loop The tumbling train
The doctor The needles The mumbling speech
The throbbing mass The lonely The empty glass
The pump The sugar The starch The steel

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:27am

The powdered gums The hardened yellow finger
The wrinkled odor The beautiful people
The wonderful glass The empty cafeteria
The dying aunt The morose man

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:26am

The slick floe of ice The fuel The words The cold
The filth The disguise The bruise The liquid heart
The self penetration The black capsules
The journey The urine The hissing asphalt?

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:26am

Dear Mr. President,

Hello there. I live in a small town in North Carolina, well, that's not exactly right. I live outside a small town, what may be termed rural. I live deep down a dirt road in a wooden house beside a creek that is cut into orange clay. That clay contains fool's gold, and the clear water that runs over it sparkles in the spears of sunlight that shoot from between pine tree branches. This is where I grew up. It's nice here.

I teach English here. Eighth grade. Most eighth graders have a lot of opinions. Some of them don't. I asked them all to write down something that they would like to say to you. I thought that you might be interested in hearing their responses. Here they are:

I am very glad that we have a good Christian man as our president.
ÂWhitney Moore, who is the shortest
person in her class.

You need to get out of the office and you need to be replaced.
ÂReyna Pacheco, who admires Selena.

I would like you to get another country to handle our light work. Osama should feel like he is picking a fight with a gang, not just one person.
ÂWill Castillo, who will be a famous
writer one day.

My favorite president is you, Mr. George Bush.
ÂJonathan King, who makes odd
noises in class.

Do you think we will ever find Bin Laden? And when will things go back to normal?
ÂMelissa Jackson, head cheerleader.

Do you think MCI and other corporations will stop laying people off their jobs and let them come back to work?
ÂJessica Walker, who likes to change
her hair color.

I wanna know why is the writing test so important to North Carolina Schools and why should it determine if we fail or pass a grade. And why is the end-of-grade test so important. I think it shouldn't really go by a test, but by grades.
ÂNikki Norman, who resembles
Alicia Keys.

Why would you be president knowing that many people don't even like you? The war didn't happen until you became President of the United States.
ÂTarika Williams, who is serious.

What would you do to make the world a better place?
ÂLeticia Antonio, who has impeccable
handwriting.

Bush I think you are doing a excellent job, considering the Terrorist attacks, and the sniper, and even the fights between Elizabeth Dole and Erskine Bowls.
ÂNatalie Calcutt, who hangs out on
the back wall.

How many 4-wheelers, etc, do you have and how many food restaurants do you have in your house?
ÂTara Spell, who plays three sports.

Did you ever think when you were little that one day you would be president?
ÂMadelyn Wooten, who also hangs
out on the back wall.

I think they should have more church camps! I love going to them.
ÂKaren Cribb, who has a big smile.

My name is Michelle Blue and I am wondering what are you going to do about the elderly people without social security and they are not able to work and they got to be the age of 65 to be able to stop working?
ÂMichelle Blue, who speaks in one
long sentence, as well.

I like cats.
ÂCourtney Barefoot, who also likes
James Brady.

Hey, Bush, why do our parents have to pay their taxes. I like eating Mexican food more than any other food.
ÂRicardo Ramirez, who always looks
sneaky.

Why is it ever since you became president that we have been having so many terrorist attacks and people trying to kill other people, or blow things up?
ÂBrittany Robinson, who doesn't
usually write this much.

Try to stop the war so we wouldn't have to worry about it anymore.
ÂJose Jose (real name)

Why do terrorists want to kill you so much?
ÂApril Tew, who flirts.

I'm thirteen years old and in the 8th grade. I go to Midway Middle. I like to talk on the phone to boys and play soccer. My favorite subject is math, but my favorite teacher is my Language Arts teacher Miss Honeycutt!
ÂLeslie Strickland, who sucks up.

What's going on?
ÂJason Conyers, who did not want me
to use his name.

My birthday is Nov. 12 and I will be 15, so if you are a president you will get me something.
ÂJames Brady, who raps.

I just want to say that you need to take your job more seriously.
ÂTeresa Goodman, who can do a
mean Harlem Shake.

These are my kids. They just wanted you to know that they are here.

Sincerely,
Britt Honeycutt, 8th grade teacher

- - - -

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:26am

The smell of fixer beneath the red light
The rotting salad for the lung shot mule
The pilgrim The innocence The unbelievable
The electric light The rise of the poet?

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:25am

manbirdexperiment wrote:

The stink of the nut brown dentures at bedside

Oh... I can see you've been "servicing" clients in Washington D.C. again...

Posted: Feb 15, 2006 - 9:25am

The whiskey drinkers The experimentation
The kirlian photographs The reverse speech
The exposure The hideous posture The cramp
The head blow The unbearable weight of shame