Fat and docile, big and dumb
They look so stupid, they aren't much fun
Cows aren't fun
They eat to grow, they grow to die
They die to be eat at the hamburger fry
Cows well done
Nobody thunk it, nobody knew
No one imagined the great cow guru
Cows are one
He hid in the forest, read books with great zeal
He loved Che Guevera, a revolutionary veal
Cow Tse Tongue
He spoke about justice, but nobody stirred
He felt like an outcast, alone, in the herd.
Cow doldrums
He mooed we must fight, escape or we'll die
Cows gathered around, cause the stakes were so high
Bad cow pun
But then he was captured, stuffed into a crate
Loaded onto a truck, where he rode to his fate
Cows are bummed
He was a scrawny calf, who looked rather woozy
No one suspected he was packing Uzi
Cows with guns
They came with a needle to stick in his thigh
He kicked for the groin, he pissed in their eye
Cow well hung
Knocked over a tractor and ran for the door
Six gallons of gas flowed out on the floor
Run cows run!
He picked up a bullhorn and jumped up on the hay
We are free roving bovines, we run free today
We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the Buffalo, or die...
Cows with guns
They crashed the gate in a great stampede
Tipped over a milk truck, torched all the feed
Cows have fun
Sixty police cars were piled in a heap
Covered in cow pies, covered up deep
Much cow dung
Black smoke rising, darkening the day
Twelve burning McDonalds, have it your way
We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
Cows with guns
The President said "Enough is Enough!
These uppity cattle, its time to get tough"
Cow dung flung
The newspapers gloated, folks sighed with relief
Tomorrow at noon, they would all be ground beef
Cows on buns
The cows were surrounded, they waited and prayed
They mooed their last moos,
they chewed their last hay
Cows out gunned
The order was given, turn cows to whoppers
Enforced by the might of ten thousand coppers
But on the horizon, surrounding the shoppers
Came the deafening roar, of chickens, in choppers!
We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
Cows with guns
| vandal (arriving somewhere, but not here. . .) | Posted: Nov 25, 2008 - 17:42 ![]() He hid in the forest, read books with great zeal He loved Che Guevara, a revolutionary veal Cow Tse Tongue |
| manzanitafire | Posted: Nov 25, 2008 - 17:40 Abso-freakin ridiculous. Just say no to the factory farm, campadres! |
| woodchuk (Belgium) | Posted: Oct 25, 2008 - 04:27 Given the number of bad puns and political references, this rates at least an 8! |
| flyboy50 (Austin TX) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:57 Three songs later and I'm still laughing. |
| ClaireWild (Ireland) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:52 Heh heh heh! Here we are sitting listening to this.......and we're surrounded in our little cottage by Bovines! Hope they ain't got no guns....sure like 'em in buns though. Thanks for playing this Bill.... a great laugh.Mooooootastic! Yeah we're both retarded. |
| window (Richmond, VA) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:51 For the life of me I can't understand how this has a rating 1 point higher than TMBG's Cowtown, which usually plays right before it. They are both tongue in cheek songs about cows. TMBG's has highly creative melody, instrument arrangement, and lyrics. This one sounds like Johnny Cash's much less successful younger brother. |
| philbertr (Hurricane Target Florida) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:50 sunybuny wrote: Very funny.... but I'm still a meatatarian. Where's my A1? I'm with you, Suny!! Give me a thick, juicy steak!! (and hold the A1, if it's prime meat) |
| hobiejoe (Pulling pints) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:49 "....with revolutionary veal..." |
| ellenaut | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:49 I've heard it only twice in four years - at that frequency it remains a 9 in my estimate. If I heard it more often, I probably wouldn't find it so entertaining. |
| maplebed (San Francisco, CA) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:49 awesome in its own wacky way. +1 not often but don't delete. ;) |
| casey1024 (Connecticut) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:48 My vote for the most unusual song I ever heard on RP goes to this. Thanks for the laugh! |
| Pyro | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:48 I had only heard this associated with an online animation. Glad to hear it here! Followed by "Shoot Doris Day" - Super Furry Animals. Yep, BillG's on a roll..... |
| HoneyBearKelly (Brooklyn) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:48 I never want to hear this again. |
| o2bnsv (Sun Valley, ID) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:47 Nice...can't stop laughing! |
| sunybuny (The West Coast & Best Coast of FLA) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:47 Very funny.... but I'm still a meatatarian. Where's my A1? |
| suzebee (Sacramento, CA) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:47 My beloved Radio Paradise cow-themed set!! What joy, what meaty, meaty joy. |
| DeeCee1109 (People's Republic of A2) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:46 |
| skdenfeld (Bend, Oregon) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:46 Cow well hung?!!! Ha Ha Ha Ha! |
| vivakitty (The Girl Who Wrecks Your Dreams) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:46 Not something I want to hear all the time - but funny! |
| KahunaMatata (Honolulu, HI) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:45 Freaking moooolarious! |
| WonderLizard (2,755.46 mi. due east of Paradise) | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:44 eat mor chikin |
| AphidA | Posted: Sep 23, 2008 - 12:44 A station-changing song......... |
| sqqqrly (Baboosic Lake, NH) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:33 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IkHCDkYkYnk |
| fretman | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:30 KSTrillian wrote: Who's Edie? Hey, Hippiechick- I figured it out- those are the guitar chords, so when separated, it makes some sense: We will (F)fight for bovine (C)freedom And (E) hold our large heads (Am) high We will (F) run free with the (C) Buffalo, or (E) die Cows with guns |
| Nabla (Cork (Ireland)) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:29 bokey wrote: Exactly! |
| cc_rider (Austin Texas. Y'all.) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:28 canadianbug wrote: this is so retarded!
Hey, I resemble that remark! It IS truly goofy. But that's okay. Sometimes we all need some goofiness. Bill's on a roll today, might as well roll with it. c. ps. Ha! As I wrote the 'roll' line, Cake's 'Wheels' comes on. Creepy... |
| Kristi (Athens, GA) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:28 Hilarious! Thanks, Bill! |
| Hannio (Austin, TX) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:28 This is one of those songs you only need to hear once in a lifetime. Any more than that is too much. |
| stephq123 (Nashville, TN) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:27 ncollingridge wrote: Fun, or simply stupid? It's certainly not Monty Python...
Stupid. |
| techer2 (my own private idaho) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:27 unanimous office decision to change our listening selection after that one. bummer :( |
| dixiedeb (Augusta, GA) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:27 That was so funny! Nice break. |
| bokey (Wastin' away in Filialdutyville) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:27 |
| trekhead (Oooh, I could just give you SUCH a Pinch!) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:27 Bill either loves this tune, or Elsie is just screwing with us... 9 just the same. |
| davezilko (Northern New Jersey) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:26 Good Laugh |
| kaviksdad (Mission Control...) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:26 (..sniff) brought a tear to my eye... |
| swampaholic (dreaming of skiing) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:26 Imkirok wrote: What do you call a cow with no legs?
--- Ground beef. "Cows on Buns" |
| rtrudeau (Bay Area, California) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:26 I love this song. Great cow puns. |
| Buzzardcheater (Austin, TX) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:26 Hannio wrote: So, you're saying they taste funny to you? Ha. lmao, perfect! |
| Nabla (Cork (Ireland)) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:25
... :puke: |
| chefhahn (Ft. Lauderdale, FL) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:25 I needed the laugh! |
| ncollingridge (Knebworth, UK) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:25 Fun, or simply stupid? It's certainly not Monty Python... |
| Ubaldo (Hurricane Alley, FL -- Inside the Cone) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:25 A mooooving experience! |
| n4ku (KY) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:25 milehighYinzer wrote: I hope William Shatner doesn't do a version of this.............
I don't know. It might be his biggest hit. |
| RussNelson | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:25 BIL++ jdorn1 wrote: Is there ANY Boiled in lead on RP? |
| Shesdifferent (Just visiting this planet) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:25 suddenchad wrote: I am a tolerant man, but this is one of the few songs (and I really mean FEW) that will make me turn off RP. The gag is mildly humorous until about the first time he says the song title. Then it's just massive tedium for the duration. Sorry. I rarely write to bag on songs I don't like, but this does it to me. You need to seriously lighten up, I mean this plays maybe once a month if that, and its just too funny!! Just go to the water cooler or something.... |
| kittyhawk (Nevada City, CA) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:24 I love it! What a crack up! |
| themotion (forgetting what has never been) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:24 the greatest thing i've ever heard |
| Wolf825 (New York) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:24 Hahaha, great. |
| keemun (Bay Area, CA) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:24 Yay! |
| cc_rider (Austin Texas. Y'all.) | Posted: Jun 07, 2007 - 08:23 Bill, you frighten me. c. |

