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Beyoncé — Texas Hold 'em
Album: Cowboy Carter
Avg rating:
5.1

Your rating:
Total ratings: 170









Released: 0
Length: 3:53
Plays (last 30 days): 3
This ain't Texas (whoo)
Ain't no hold 'em (hey)
So lay your cards down, down, down, down
So park your Lexus (whoo)
And throw your keys up (hey)
Stick around, 'round, 'round, 'round, 'round (stick around)
And I'll be damned if I can't slow-dance with you
Come pour some sugar on me, honey too
It's a real-life boogie and a real-life hoedown
Don't be a - (hey), come take it to the floor now, whoo, ha (whoo)
There's a tornado (there's a tornado)
In my city (in my city)
Hit the basement (hit the basement)
That - ain't pretty (that - ain't pretty)
Rugged whiskey (rugged whiskey)
'Cause we survivin' ('cause we survivin')
Off red-cup kisses, sweet redemption, passin' time, yeah
Ooh, one step to the right
We headed to the dive bar we always thought was nice
Ooh, run me to the left
Then spin me in the middle, boy, I can't read your mind
This ain't Texas (whoo)
Ain't no hold 'em (hey)
So lay your cards down, down, down, down
So park your Lexus (whoo)
And throw your keys up (hey)
And stick around, 'round, 'round, 'round, 'round (stick around)
And I'll be damned if I can't slow-dance with you
Come pour some sugar on me, honey too
It's a real-life boogie and a real-life hoedown
Don't be a - (hey), come take it to the floor now, woo
And I'll be damned if I cannot dance with you
Come pour some liquor on me, honey too
It's a real-life boogie and a real-life hoedown
Don't be a - (hey), come take it to the floor now, woo
Whoo-hoo
Whoo-hoo
Whoo-hoo
There's a heatwave (there's a heatwave)
Comin' at us (comin' at us)
Too hot to think straight (too hot to think straight)
Too cold to panic (cold to panic)
All of the problems
Just feel dramatic (just feel dramatic)
And now we're runnin' to the first bar that we find, yeah
Ooh, one step to the right
We headed to the dive bar we always thought was nice
Ooh, you run to the left
Just work me in the middle, boy, I can't read your mind
This ain't Texas (whoo)
Ain't no hold 'em (hey)
So lay your cards down, down, down, down, oh
So park your Lexus (hey)
And throw your keys up (hey)
And stick around,' round, 'round, 'round, 'round (stick around)
And I'll be damned if I cannot dance with you
Come pour some sugar on me, honey too
It's a real-life boogie and a real-life hoedown
Don't be a - (hey), come take it to the floor now (whoo)
And I'll be damned if I cannot dance with you
Come pour some liquor on me, honey too
It's a real-life boogie and a real-life hoedown
Don't be a -, come take it to the floor now, ooh
Take it to the floor now, ooh
Hoops, spurs, boots
To the floor now, ooh
Tuck (ooh), back (ooh), oops (ooh)
Shoot
Come take it to the floor now, ooh
And I'll be damned if I cannot dance with you
Baby, pour that sugar and liquor on me, too
Furs, spurs, boots
Solargenic, photogenic, shoot
Comments (36)add comment
I'd like to think I don't make negative comments about songs on here, but about the only way that I could like this song less is if it really was the Lumineers in the background doing those infernal whoos and heys.
 RicoDrumz wrote:
No thank you... failed attempt at a crossover - Pop is pop no matter what hat you're wearing... 

I got news for you cowboy... modern "country" sounds like pop music.  Go back to Patsy Cline, Dolly Parton, Reba McIntire... hell even female artists as recent as the 2000s Dixie Chicks or '90s Shania Twain sound more authentically country than the new songs which are so so trite and unoriginal.
 xray38 wrote:

I can hear the Peter Principal in action on this one.




I can read the Peter Principle in action in this comment.
The slippery slope into gospel has begun.
Glad RP plays it, but it's a NO for me.
Aghh NO
 SgtBeefheart wrote:

Any ideas how she manages to stay on that horse?



She's from Texas!
I'm 72 years old and certainly not a Beyonce fan and not even a cowboy, but I do love this song. Keep it weird RP!
I can hear the Peter Principal in action on this one.
I'm not a Beyonce listener, I don't listen to country but will visit a bluegrass show, and I think she absolutely has the right to make a country album (Go B), but this song feels.. flat and awkward to me. 

Maybe it works better at higher volume in a country bar?

Rating over to the left (4.x) seems about right.
No idea who this was until coming here...not my cup of tea, but certainly don't object.
Yuck
Heck yeah!!
Thanks Bill!! 

How many people here would have given this a 6 if they hadn't seen the name of the artist? I wonder...
umm...nice to hear diversity. bout all I can say
I'm surprised to hear it on RP, but...  not bad, I liked it okay.
Would do well on mainstream Country stations if the artist was not Beyonce (they will never accept her).  But, there is a reason most RP listeners don't listen to mainstream Country. Absolutely loved her country tune with The Chicks (formerly the Dixie Chicks) from a few years ago.  This, however,  is not good. 
I like the fact that the album features music and/or musicians from this genre, but I watched the video for this specific song and it's basically Bey posing in country "settings" in her different outfits. Kinda weird. But I'll keep that out of my 7 rating.
Love Rihannon!
Y'all do what you need to do with programming, but if you're going in this direction I would think that a deeper cut might serve the RP purpose more strongly. 
I liked it! 
Why not
No thank you... failed attempt at a crossover - Pop is pop no matter what hat you're wearing... 
Ok.  I knew this was a thing but hadn't bothered to listen to it yet. Did not expect to hear it here for the first time. But after all these years, I really shouldn't be surprised.   Keep keeping it weird RP!
Rhiannon Giddens on banjo!
Harmless fun. Nobody got hurt.
Eclectic radio is awesome.
Is nowhere safe?
I listened to the album on its release 29th March. I really love the earlier album Lemonade and the track Daddy Lessons which is absolutely superb (sadly rejected for the playlist by RP), so I was keen to hear an album that ploughed the same furough. 

This track is very enjoyable, but not as strong to my ears as Daddy Lessons. 

I have yet to be convinced by the rest of the album. 
More garbage.
Shrug. 
I liked this the first time I heard it, but yeah, I'm another one surprised to hear it on RP.  Keep on keeping us guessing, y'all!
easily the worst song of the year and thats got some stiff competetion
Not my kinda "country music".....but she was Born in Austin Texas!!!!

So, she got some real Cowgirl in her probably! 
Any ideas how she manages to stay on that horse?
I heard this somewhere recently and I think it was an ad jingle.  I like the banjo, I like Beyoncé’s voice but not a fan of the lyrics.  
Okay, then.
Bill: did you find this on TikTok?