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Index »
Radio Paradise/General »
General Discussion »
Unquiet Minds - Mental Health Forum
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Page: Previous 1, 2, 3 ... 20, 21, 22 ... 115, 116, 117 Next |
(former member)
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Posted:
Aug 30, 2011 - 10:32am |
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One of my FB links popped up with this, this afternoon.... "I am who I am and your approval isn't needed."
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Leslie
Location: Antioch, CA Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 9:56pm |
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BlueHeronDruid
Location: Заебани сме луѓе
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 9:52pm |
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BillnDollarBaby wrote:Well.... my re-entry into therapy is paying off. She's an hour drive away. Tonight I had to drive home in the dark, a lightning storm and some rain sprinkles. I wasn't thrilled, but I didn't melt down. That's improvement. Now if it had been full on raining, I'd likely be on the side of the road somewhere a county north of here melted into a sobbing mess. But still.... there's some progress back towards normal and that's good. Funny thing is, we're not directly addressing the driving issue. I had the gut feeling some other things were really bothering me and exacerbating the anxiety issue. Turns out I was right. I have a long way to go on both fronts, but even a little progress feels good.
I am impressed and pleased for you.
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winter
Location: in exile, as always Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 7:31pm |
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justlistening wrote:I hope you find the outlook you're looking for (I joke good-naturedly I hope you know)
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(former member)
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 7:22pm |
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justlistening wrote:I hope you find the outlook you're looking for (I joke good-naturedly I hope you know) And thank you all for the good vibes and the lurve.
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rosedraws
Location: close to the edge Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 7:15pm |
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BillnDollarBaby wrote:I have a long way to go on both fronts, but even a little progress feels good.
excellent.
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justlistening
Location: So. California Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 7:14pm |
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BillnDollarBaby wrote:Well.... my re-entry into therapy is paying off. She's an hour drive away. Tonight I had to drive home in the dark, a lightning storm and some rain sprinkles. I wasn't thrilled, but I didn't melt down. That's improvement. Now if it had been full on raining, I'd likely be on the side of the road somewhere a county north of here melted into a sobbing mess. But still.... there's some progress back towards normal and that's good. Funny thing is, we're not directly addressing the driving issue. I had the gut feeling some other things were really bothering me and exacerbating the anxiety issue. Turns out I was right. I have a long way to go on both fronts, but even a little progress feels good.
I hope you find the outlook you're looking for (I joke good-naturedly I hope you know)
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oldviolin
Location: esse quam videri Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 6:47pm |
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BillnDollarBaby wrote:Well.... my re-entry into therapy is paying off. She's an hour drive away. Tonight I had to drive home in the dark, a lightning storm and some rain sprinkles. I wasn't thrilled, but I didn't melt down. That's improvement. Now if it had been full on raining, I'd likely be on the side of the road somewhere a county north of here melted into a sobbing mess. But still.... there's some progress back towards normal and that's good. Funny thing is, we're not directly addressing the driving issue. I had the gut feeling some other things were really bothering me and exacerbating the anxiety issue. Turns out I was right. I have a long way to go on both fronts, but even a little progress feels good. I hope the best for you.
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Coaxial
Location: Comfortably numb in So Texas Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 6:45pm |
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BillnDollarBaby wrote:Well.... my re-entry into therapy is paying off. She's an hour drive away. Tonight I had to drive home in the dark, a lightning storm and some rain sprinkles. I wasn't thrilled, but I didn't melt down. That's improvement. Now if it had been full on raining, I'd likely be on the side of the road somewhere a county north of here melted into a sobbing mess. But still.... there's some progress back towards normal and that's good. Funny thing is, we're not directly addressing the driving issue. I had the gut feeling some other things were really bothering me and exacerbating the anxiety issue. Turns out I was right. I have a long way to go on both fronts, but even a little progress feels good.
Good on you.
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winter
Location: in exile, as always Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 6:39pm |
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BillnDollarBaby wrote:Well.... my re-entry into therapy is paying off. She's an hour drive away. Tonight I had to drive home in the dark, a lightning storm and some rain sprinkles. I wasn't thrilled, but I didn't melt down. That's improvement. Now if it had been full on raining, I'd likely be on the side of the road somewhere a county north of here melted into a sobbing mess. But still.... there's some progress back towards normal and that's good. Funny thing is, we're not directly addressing the driving issue. I had the gut feeling some other things were really bothering me and exacerbating the anxiety issue. Turns out I was right. I have a long way to go on both fronts, but even a little progress feels good.
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lily34
Location: GTFO Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 6:31pm |
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BillnDollarBaby wrote:Well.... my re-entry into therapy is paying off. She's an hour drive away. Tonight I had to drive home in the dark, a lightning storm and some rain sprinkles. I wasn't thrilled, but I didn't melt down. That's improvement. Now if it had been full on raining, I'd likely be on the side of the road somewhere a county north of here melted into a sobbing mess. But still.... there's some progress back towards normal and that's good. Funny thing is, we're not directly addressing the driving issue. I had the gut feeling some other things were really bothering me and exacerbating the anxiety issue. Turns out I was right. I have a long way to go on both fronts, but even a little progress feels good. proud of you
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Red_Dragon
Location: Dumbf*ckistan
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 6:29pm |
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BillnDollarBaby wrote:Well.... my re-entry into therapy is paying off. She's an hour drive away. Tonight I had to drive home in the dark, a lightning storm and some rain sprinkles. I wasn't thrilled, but I didn't melt down. That's improvement. Now if it had been full on raining, I'd likely be on the side of the road somewhere a county north of here melted into a sobbing mess. But still.... there's some progress back towards normal and that's good. Funny thing is, we're not directly addressing the driving issue. I had the gut feeling some other things were really bothering me and exacerbating the anxiety issue. Turns out I was right. I have a long way to go on both fronts, but even a little progress feels good.
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triskele
Location: The Dragons' Roost
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 6:25pm |
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BillnDollarBaby wrote:Well.... my re-entry into therapy is paying off. She's an hour drive away. Tonight I had to drive home in the dark, a lightning storm and some rain sprinkles. I wasn't thrilled, but I didn't melt down. That's improvement. Now if it had been full on raining, I'd likely be on the side of the road somewhere a county north of here melted into a sobbing mess. But still.... there's some progress back towards normal and that's good. Funny thing is, we're not directly addressing the driving issue. I had the gut feeling some other things were really bothering me and exacerbating the anxiety issue. Turns out I was right. I have a long way to go on both fronts, but even a little progress feels good.
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(former member)
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Posted:
Aug 29, 2011 - 6:24pm |
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Well.... my re-entry into therapy is paying off. She's an hour drive away. Tonight I had to drive home in the dark, a lightning storm and some rain sprinkles. I wasn't thrilled, but I didn't melt down. That's improvement. Now if it had been full on raining, I'd likely be on the side of the road somewhere a county north of here melted into a sobbing mess. But still.... there's some progress back towards normal and that's good. Funny thing is, we're not directly addressing the driving issue. I had the gut feeling some other things were really bothering me and exacerbating the anxiety issue. Turns out I was right. I have a long way to go on both fronts, but even a little progress feels good.
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Zissy
Location: 90804 Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 28, 2011 - 7:02pm |
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Skaterella wrote:I'm in a similar ( perhaps) but very different place than you Zissy. I grew up in a very dysfunctional family. As a kid my mother constantly told me that my grandparents didn't like me. Now I have kids & my insane parents want a relationship with my kids but any involvement for me with them is basically abusive. I don't want to saddle my kids with the insanity I had as a kid so I don't tell them their grandparents are lunatics. It's very difficult. I don't mean to insinuate in any way that you are the problem - just that I feel your pain. Hope it gets better. yup dysfunctional I understand for sure. I'm so sorry to hear that you were told that growing up. I can understand not wanting them to be involved in your childrens lives. If you ever decide to I would always be in the same room ready to whisk them away. My son and I were very close when he was young and then when he turned 13 all hell broke loose. By the time he was 16 my dad had passed and he and I were very close and I fell deep into depression. I wanted my son close but of course he was growing up and wanting to be with friends and was never home. I was in a bad relationship with his dad and when my son was 16 I took off and never looked back. Of course I called him and when he was 18 he moved with me in Los Angeles. Things were good when they were good but when they weren't he would go into a tirade about me leaving and I let him because he has a right to his feelings. We spent hours talking about how that hurt him and I have never told him that his feelings are wrong and things would be good again until they weren't and the cycle continues. So now we are like oil and water. I've apologized more than anyone will ever know and I blame myself every day for leaving but I couldn't cope with the abuse of his father (physical and mental), the loss of my dad and a kid that was basically out of control so I left. He is now 29yrs old and is still in the blame mode and I keep apologizing and probably will for the rest of my life.
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Zissy
Location: 90804 Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 28, 2011 - 6:47pm |
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hippiechick wrote:So sorry you have to go through this . I can only imagine that the parents will get their payback when their own child grows up. Can you set up a regular schedule to skype him, or are the parents too restrictive? thank you so much. It's not that they are restrictive it's more like they don't care how anyone else feels. If I say anything it's said that I'm making it all about me. Arrggg kids.....Hugs
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Zissy
Location: 90804 Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 28, 2011 - 6:45pm |
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Manbird wrote: I don't see anything unusual about that. Kids are always made to call their grandparent and say hi. Little kids, of course, don't want to have a conversation with an adult. It's perfectly normal for the kid to want to go play, instead, or be shy on the phone. I used have to get on the phone and say hello to my grandparents and other relatives and I would grumble and mumble about it. Same with my son when I would put him on the phone with one of his grandparents. Complain, mumble, grumble. No big deal. totally normal and expected. I know there's probably more to this situation that's making you feel bad - but, really, what you describe sounds fine. I don't think he's being traumatized by being asked to say hi to you even if he doesn't want to. All you have to do is say hi this is grandma, I love you, now go play and have fun. As often as you want (or are allowed to?). Not a big deal. If that's really too much for the kid, send lot's of cards and stuff with you photo. One thing that I used to love was getting a package from one on my grandparents or Godparent. It really made me remember them and appreciate them even when I was really little. It sounds like you're really depressed - I can relate. I often go to bed when I'm too sad to cope. I really hope you feel better. Just know it's not forever - sometimes you just have to wait it out until there's a little break in the clouds then try and take advantage of it and start moving again
I met my grandson once when he was two and we've talked a couple of times on the phone and that is it. My son and I have a very stressful relationship at best and when my grandson was born they kept me away from him until I got to see him when he was two. He lives now with his mom and maternal grandparents because my son decided that being married wasn't for him about 2 months ago so that has also added to my grandsons stress. I just felt really bad for him today because he almost sounded scared. I have asked many times for them to let him call me once a week so that he can get used to it but that has never happened and now with this added stress on their little family I just need to stand down. As for being depressed yes I've been this way for probably most of my life. I grew up with a mother that spent most of her life in her bedroom while I raised my brother and sister. I take 200mg of Zoloft but sometimes that doesn't even cut it. I stopped therapy because it always made me feel worse dredging up all that crap that makes me feel this way. It's nice to know that there are others out in the world like me but also saddens me because we all deserve to be happy. Thanks for listening. Hugs
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Skaterella
Location: jrzy Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 28, 2011 - 1:42pm |
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I'm in a similar ( perhaps) but very different place than you Zissy. I grew up in a very dysfunctional family. As a kid my mother constantly told me that my grandparents didn't like me. Now I have kids & my insane parents want a relationship with my kids but any involvement for me with them is basically abusive. I don't want to saddle my kids with the insanity I had as a kid so I don't tell them their grandparents are lunatics. It's very difficult. I don't mean to insinuate in any way that you are the problem - just that I feel your pain. Hope it gets better.
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justlistening
Location: So. California Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 28, 2011 - 1:23pm |
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Manbird wrote: I don't see anything unusual about that. Kids are always made to call their grandparent and say hi. Little kids, of course, don't want to have a conversation with an adult. It's perfectly normal for the kid to want to go play, instead, or be shy on the phone. I used have to get on the phone and say hello to my grandparents and other relatives and I would grumble and mumble about it. Same with my son when I would put him on the phone with one of his grandparents. Complain, mumble, grumble. No big deal. totally normal and expected. I know there's probably more to this situation that's making you feel bad - but, really, what you describe sounds fine. I don't think he's being traumatized by being asked to say hi to you even if he doesn't want to. All you have to do is say hi this is grandma, I love you, now go play and have fun. As often as you want (or are allowed to?). Not a big deal. If that's really too much for the kid, send lot's of cards and stuff with you photo. One thing that I used to love was getting a package from one on my grandparents or Godparent. It really made me remember them and appreciate them even when I was really little. It sounds like you're really depressed - I can relate. I often go to bed when I'm too sad to cope. I really hope you feel better. Just know it's not forever - sometimes you just have to wait it out until there's a little break in the clouds then try and take advantage of it and start moving again
Manbird, everything you say is true. Good advice too. My three kids live 3000 miles away from their grandparents. They would do the same thing when they were young and it came to talking on the phone to their grandparents. It does help if the parents are supportive, but Zissy manbird is right, don't despair. Email them, mail them, talk when you can. Just concentrate on the love you can give them and as they grow it will flow back to you.
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Manbird
Location: La Villa Toscana Gender:
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Posted:
Aug 28, 2011 - 12:39pm |
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Zissy wrote:another tough day filled with tears but seems the norm for me. my son let my grandson call me today but he really didn't want to be on the phone with someone he really doesn't know and I felt bad for him. so he mumbled a few words as 4 year olds do and then he wanted to watch his program on tv. I messaged my daughter in law later and told her that I didn't want to add any more stress on to my grandson to have to talk to someone that he doesn't know and that I wasn't going to push it any more. it's very painful for me but I love him so much and I don't want him to be pushed into talking to me whenever his parents feel that it is ok. I hope they understand one day what they have done by being so selfish. Well I guess another day of sleeping. bah I don't see anything unusual about that. Kids are always made to call their grandparent and say hi. Little kids, of course, don't want to have a conversation with an adult. It's perfectly normal for the kid to want to go play, instead, or be shy on the phone. I used have to get on the phone and say hello to my grandparents and other relatives and I would grumble and mumble about it. Same with my son when I would put him on the phone with one of his grandparents. Complain, mumble, grumble. No big deal. totally normal and expected. I know there's probably more to this situation that's making you feel bad - but, really, what you describe sounds fine. I don't think he's being traumatized by being asked to say hi to you even if he doesn't want to. All you have to do is say hi this is grandma, I love you, now go play and have fun. As often as you want (or are allowed to?). Not a big deal. If that's really too much for the kid, send lot's of cards and stuff with you photo. One thing that I used to love was getting a package from one on my grandparents or Godparent. It really made me remember them and appreciate them even when I was really little. It sounds like you're really depressed - I can relate. I often go to bed when I'm too sad to cope. I really hope you feel better. Just know it's not forever - sometimes you just have to wait it out until there's a little break in the clouds then try and take advantage of it and start moving again
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